Bravo, RightsforMothers!

You want justice?  Pack the court room with people wearing purple ribbons.     Vernetta Cockerham and RitaAnita Linger proved this strategy worked in North Carolina.  PETA proved it worked when a couple of punks savagely killed a stray dog.  Sadly, nobody showed up to pack the same judge’s courtroom when a little girl was allegedly raped by her daddy.  Nobody cared about what happened to that little girl until her daddy killed four Lakewood, WA cops.  A teenager in the same county was similarly not protected from her daddy’s abuse.  Nobody cared about what happened to her until her daddy killed a cop and wounded another.  This brave teenager ended up having to protect the cops during a close-range shoot-out with her daddy.

Truth be told, the system still doesn’t care about the welfare of those two girls.  Gov. Christine Gregoire is deeply concerned about the welfare of her police officers, but preventing domestic violence isn’t a priority for her.  She doesn’t get that those cops are all dead because domestic violence victims don’t get much real protection in Pierce County, WA.  And, she certainly doesn’t get how much Washington’s failure to make domestic violence a priority is costing the taxpayers.

Searching for Justice © 2009, Carole May

Bravo, Rights for Mothers!

Pit bull abusers have lots of Internet help available to them on how to manipulate the legal system as an instrument of abuse.  They quickly learn they’ll go to jail for physicial abuse.  In jail, they learn that they can more brutally ~ and legally ~ hurt a mother by taking away her kids.  In a strategy as old as Adam blaming Eve for the apple, they turn the tables on their victims.  Women fiercely trying to protect their kids from brutal fathers find themselves called prostitutes and addicts and mentally unstable.  Many find their professional careers blackballed by false accusations and innuendos.

Rights for Mothers, however, is a valiant advocate for these women.  Her blog focuses on Parental Alienation Syndrome which all the experts agree is bullshit, but judges around the country keep falling for it.  Why?  They either are abusive behind their own closed doors or they have never been to judicial training to learn about the dynamics of litigation abuse and how to stop it.

Rights for Mothers has been a champion for women like Julie Levine ~ where is the media ~ why don’t they engage in their First Amendment duty to investigate?  It boggles the mind how a judge could find it in the best interest of these kids to be with their brutal fathers rather than with their fiercely protective mothers.

Update:  Shortly after this post, WordPress yielded to pressures exerted by powerful abusive men who were held accountable by Rights for Mothers.  Her blog was “tossed” by WordPress.  But, Nancy will NOT be stopped.  She’s back open for business at  http://rightsformothers.comPlease be patient while she goes through the arduous process of reloading her vast library of information onto her new site.

Breaking Down the Walls of Silence:  Power of the Sisterhood and the Press

Let’sGetHonest, who has an insider’s knowledge, blows the whistle on “creaming” by non-profit agencies ~ this is why so many women experiencing domestic violence don’t get help from the system.

In August, 2009, O Magazine did extensive investigative journalism into Vernetta Cockerham’s story.  Her story, sadly, is the story of many women experiencing domestic violence.

Denise Richards got justice ~ it took her four very long years.  She was quite fortunate to have the funds to prevail over her ex-husband actor Charlie Sheen, who is a serial pit-bull abuser.  Sandra Boss similarly was able to fund the long fight to hold her ex-husband “Clark Rockefeller” accountable for kidnapping their daughter Snooks.  He’s now serving five years in prison.

Sadly, most women don’t have that kind of money.  These strategies are as old as preachers falsely suggesting Mary Magdalene is a prostitute because she was Jesus’ favorite disciple.

I hope those of you walking in the shoes of these brave women will click on the purple words in this post.  You are most definitely not alone, and the litigation abuse you are experiencing is not unique.  We all need to contribute our own talents to break down the walls of silence and demand justice.  When we band together as sisters, we will all be empowered.  And, we will get justice.  Finally.

Update:  On July 21, 2013, I deleted the shout-out to Claudine Dombrowski from this post.  I have kept silent for years about the corrosive impact of her vicious attacks on effective advocates for protective mothers.  I have been on the receiving end of these vicious attacks, and this is why I rarely write about protective mothers’ issues.  In my opinion, Ms. Drombrowski’s need to be in the spotlight trumps her concern for her daughter as well as substantially undermines real progress by protective mothers.

Hopefully, I have deleted all references to Ms. Drombowski and the AMPP from my blog.  If someone notices one I’ve missed, I hope you will leave a comment to bring it to my attention.

7 responses to “Bravo, RightsforMothers!

  1. Pingback: Bravo, RightsforMothers & Claudine Dombrowski! by Anne Caroline Drake | Mothers Global Justice Alliance·

  2. Great question, Debbie!

    First, click on all the purple words in this post. They will take you to my other posts on this subject. In those posts, click on the words that are a different color from the rest of the text for even more posts.

    You may not need a whole bunch of people. A woman in Canada followed Claudine’s example with only two people with her. It worked like a charm. They had their notebooks, and the judge got the message that the court of public opinion is important too.

    Second, if you or someone in your area writes a blog, put out a call to action like we did for Vernetta Cockerham.

    Third, if you have friends, relatives, people at your house of worship, neighbors, fellow DV survivors, or colleagues who are willing to go to court with you, ask them to come to your next important court date.

    If you don’t, ask the executive director at your local sheleter to do for you what RitaAnita Linger did for Vernetta Cockerham. Alternatively, ask the person in charge of DV in your local prosecutor’s office for ideas of where you can find a bunch of court watchers and/or DV survivors. Go to the top. An advocate may not have the courage or faith that this will work.

    If your shelter is asleep at the switch, go to your local senior citizens center. Bring a cake or some donuts or something to share. Talk with some of the women. I can guarantee you that some of them have walked in your shoes. These ladies may be willing to get a gang together to go with you. Look for the spunky leader.

    In a lot of respects, Debbie, you are planning a party which will take place in the courtroom. Try to think of everybody you can who might want to come ~ sometimes it is easier to enlist the help of strangers than people we already know ~ invite everybody you can think of.

    The people who will be most willing to go with you will be women who have walked in your shoes. Trust me. There’s a lot of them out there. They may not talk about it, but they’ve been where you are. Some of them are still mad about it and will want to help you get what they didn’t get. Some will be angry that they didn’t think of it and won’t help.

    If people say they can’t or won’t come, do not take it personally. A lot of people have so much on their plate already that they just can’t be there for us when we need them.

    If anybody dares pass judgment on you, just walk away with your head held high. You deserve their respect and support. Abusive people don’t like to be told their behavior is inappropriate ~ directly or indirectly ~ they’ll want to silence you so they can continue their evil deeds.

    Finally, go to a craft or fabric store to get yourself some purple and white ribbon and small pins. Make ribbons for everyone to wear. They look like the ones for breast cancer except they are purple and white. I have one from Crystal Judson Brame’s funeral that has a little rhinestone heart pasted where the ribbon comes together that I absolutely treasure. I wear it every time I go to a DV event or rally.

    If your budget is really tight, you can just use purple ribbon. You could also use labels/name badges with a purple ribbon painted on it. It is a little like a high school sports event ~ folks come dressed so everybody knows which team they support. So, I suppose you could also just ask people to wear something purple.

    If I haven’t explained this well, please leave another comment. I applaud you for having the courage to do this for yourself. If you live in WA State, I’ll e-mail you privately and come with you. Claudine is in the Kansas City area. BettyJean is in the NYC area. I’m not sure where Nancy Carroll lives, but she’ll travel. RitaAnita and Vernetta are in NC.

    If you are involved in a custodial issue, Nancy Carroll at would be your best bet to put out the call if you aren’t able to get help locally. She has way more visitors to her site than I do. I, of course, will be happy to join in. Claudine probably would too.

    So, good luck, Debbie. You aren’t in this alone.

    Anne Caroline

  3. Pingback: Be There: 200th Judicial Court, Austin, TX on June 7 @ 7:45AM « Anne Caroline Drake·

  4. Pingback: Jacqueline Costadura needs your help to protect her daughter (Austin TX) « Battered Mothers-A Human Rights Issue·

  5. Pingback: Jacqueline Costadura needs your help to protect her daughter (Austin TX) « Silence Is Oppression (PAS)·

  6. Pingback: repost via: « My hypothetical divorce·

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