Charles Dickens

A Christmas Carol, Oliver Twist, and Great Expectations were best-selling books that received critical acclaim and endured to become classics and movies we all love.  We’ve all known a Scrooge and sometimes perhaps been one.  We’ve also been blessed by the pure love of a Tiny Tim and his wish for God to bless us all.  I’m sure I’m not the only woman who has tempted the man in her life with the line from Oliver Twist:  ”please, sir, may I have some more?”

Miss Havisham in Great Expectations had an epic inability to let go after she was jilted on her wedding day.  She is the poster child for a bitter, manipulative eccentric bitch.

Charles Dickens’ classics also include David Copperfield, Nicholas Nickleby, The Old Curiosity Shop, Bleak House, Hard Times, The Pickwick Papers, and A Tale of Two Cities.  His books have never gone out of print.

Charles Dickens’ tales were calls for equal access to justice and compassion for society’s most vulnerable citizens ~ especially abused children.  He exposed hypocrisy and criticized social policy designed to brutally punish people for the crime of being born poor.  He is a timeless champion for the underdog.

He was 25 years old when he published his first best-seller, Oliver Twist.  He wrote A Christmas Carol in 1843 in six weeks.  The original manuscript is on display at the Morgan Library & Museum in New York City.  Black & Blue author Anna Quindlen claims she makes a pilgrimage to be inspired by it every year at Christmas.  Many of his books were first published in serial form ~ a marketing tool similar to today’s blogging.

Charles John Huffam Dickens  was born in Landport, Portsmouth, England on Feb. 7, 1812.  At age 12, his father went to debtor’s prison and young Charles went to work.  His transformed himself and his circumstances by writing compassionately and humorously about his experiences.

His pet raven Grip was Edgar Allan Poe’s inspiration for the poem “The Raven.”  Grip has been preserved and is on display at the Philadelphia Public Library.

Mr. Dickens and his wife Catherine Thomson Hogarth had 10 children.  In 1846, he founded Urania Cottage as a home for “fallen women.”  In 1858, he left his wife for his mistress, actress Nelly Ternan.  He died on June 9, 1870 at age 58 after having a stroke at his home, Gad’s Hill Place in Kent.

Gad's Hill Place

You can read more about Charles Dickens and the Dickens Bicentenary at:

Dickens 2012:  Celebrating the 200th Birthday of Charles Dickens

NPR’s “A Tale of Two Centuries”

“Philadelphia Celebrates Dickens’ 200th Birthday,” San Francisco Chronicle

Original manuscript of A Christmas Carol at the Morgan, NYC

David Perdue’s Charles Dickens Page, an on-line encyclopedia of all things Dickens

Charles Dickens biography

The Google Doodle:  Famous characters from Dickens’ books

Photo courtesy of Shannon Wilson

Susan Cox Powell

 Dorothy L. Nolte wrote “Children Learn What They Live,” and it seemed like a good reminder for all of us as we heal, honor, and celebrate the lives of Susan, Charlie, and Bradon. 

Some of us were blessed with great parents, and some of us are re-parenting ourselves.

If children live with CRITICISM, they learn to CONDEMN.

If children live with HOSTILITY, they learn to FIGHT.

If children live with FEAR, they learn to BE APPREHENSIVE.

If children live with PITY, they learn to FEEL SORRY for themselves.

If children live with RIDICULE, they learn to BE SHY.

If children live with JEALOUSY, they learn what ENVY is.

If children live with SHAME, they learn to FEEL GUILTY.

Susan, Bradon, and Charlie

If children live with TOLERANCE, they learn to BE PATIENT.

If children live with ENCOURAGEMENT, they learn CONFIDENCE.

If children live with PRAISE, they learn to APPRECIATE.

If children live with APPROVAL, they learn to LIKE THEMSELVES.

If children live with ACCEPTANCE, they FIND LOVE in the world.

If children live with RECOGNITION, they learn to HAVE A GOAL.

If children live with SHARING, they learn to BE GENEROUS.

If children live with HONESTY and FAIRNESS, they learn TRUTH and JUSTICE.

If children live with SECURITY, they have FAITH.

If children live with FRIENDLINESS, they learn the WORLD IS A NICE PLACE.

If children live with SERENITY, they learn to have PEACE OF MIND.

What do parents at Carson Elementary School tell their children about the double-murder-suicide of Charlie (age 7) and Braden (age 5) Powell by their father Josh Powell?

Powell Family

Charlie and Braden’s mother Susan Cox Powell has been missing since December 7, 2009.   According to Cox family attorney Steve Downing, Charlie recently shared what he remembered about that night:

The oldest boy talked about that they went camping and that Mommy was in the trunk.  Mom and Dad got out of the car and Mom disappeared.

Judge Kathryn Nelson

 Josh Powell, who was a person of interest in his wife’s disappearance, wanted to regain custody of his sons.  Judge Kathryn Nelson ordered him to undergo a psycho-sexual evaluation and polygraph test first.  But, she made the fatal mistake of allowing supervised visits to continue.

“Act of Evil”

Early yesterday afternoon, the boys dashed from the social worker’s car into their father’s house in Graham, WA.  Josh Powell prevented her from entering the home.  She smelled gas, but he blew the house up before she could possibly intervene to protect the children. 

The bodies were found in the same room in the middle of the house.  Mr. Downing said the Cox family were afraid for the safety of their grandsons:

They were always very fearful of him doing something like this, and he did it.

Kirk Graves, Powell’s brother-in-law, told KOMO (ABC affiliate):

His world was falling apart around him and he was going to lose his boys and get arrested for Susan’s disappearance.  He’s a narcissist and he has no love for anyone but himself.

On CNN, he just said he believes this is Josh Powell’s admission of guilt in Susan Cox Powell’s disappearance.  Family members told CNN that the boys were possessions to Josh Powell.  They all knew he would harm the boys.

Judy and Chuck Cox

The Cox family did everything they knew how to do to protect their grandsons from Josh Powell and his father Steven Powell, who is in jail on 15 felony counts of child pornography and voyeurism.  They had two attorneys working arduously on their behalf.

Today they must be experiencing grief that most of us can’t comprehend.  We all express our condolences, but I think we need to do more.  I want you to join me in shining a bright spotlight on Pierce County, WA.

Photo courtesy of Shannon Wilson

There is no acceptable excuse for the system’s failure to protect Charlie and Braden Powell.  Josh Powell was a textbook PAS father and pit bull abuser.  Judge Nelson never should have placed the burden of protecting these innocent boys on a social worker.  And, the Seattle area press needs to stop playing lap dog.  We don’t need any more collective hand-wringing.  We need solid investigative journalism.  We need everyone to get their heads out of their asses about PAS.

Who do you love?  Who?  Who?

February is the month of love.  Yet, most survivors of child abuse and domestic violence don’t always feel the love.  We don’t always feel safe at home.

When it comes to sending Valentine roses to express our love, our own names sadly don’t always top our list of people we love enough to send our very best.  We’ve been conditioned to put ourselves last on the list.

In a couple of weeks, red roses will cost a small fortune.  Yesterday, however, I was able to buy a dozen red roses and five delicate white iris at Safeway for less than $15.  I bought them to celebrate having a safe haven this year and to honor the three women who made it possible:  Lindsey, Piril, and Jess. 

This owl graphic shares wall space with my diplomas and awards.  It reminds me that we are all blessed with wisdom.  It reminds me that all God’s children are deserving of being treated with dignity and respect.

I did the needlepoint at the top of this post decades ago.  Survivors of child abuse and domestic violence sometimes need to be reminded that nobody’s perfect.  Many of us have become over-achievers to try to earn love that should have come to us unconditionally.

This year on Valentine’s Day (V-Day), I hope the name at the top of your love list is your own.  You deserve to be loved and respected without condition.  This isn’t an arrogant idea.  It is God’s grace.

Why do so many pro”life” folks vote against funding to care for children once they are born?

There’s wisdom in the old adage:  Your actions speak so loudly I can’t hear what you’re saying.

This last one was posted by Dominique Lamb late today.

On January 14, 2012, it started to snow in Seattle.  I noticed the world was a soft black and white.

One of the things I most love about living in Seattle is that it snows about once a year.  It’s pretty.  It isn’t cold outside.  The snow remains pristine because it melts before the soot can collect.

We rarely get two days of snow.  The snow this year, however, kept falling for days.

By the time it finally stopped on January 18, the trees seemed to be saying, “enough already!”  A lesson in moderation from Ma Nature, eh?

Still, there’s something mystical and magical in the splendor of towering evergreens blanketed in snow at midnight.  These beautiful trees endured the ice that followed with grace and strength.

Now, it is all melting.  Our annual gift from Ma Nature ended about the same time most of us started to get cabin fever.  For the rest of the year, our snow will remain in the mountains where it belongs.

Happy Birthday, Kiwi Mary!

Bitzie Dressed to Express

On November 1, I crashed and took time off to celebrate achieving a challenge that was equal parts exhilarating and exhausting.  On an Artist’s Date back to the places I photographed last spring, I captured the beauty of the Pacific Northwest in the fall.

I ran into a treasured colleague and champion who urged me to engage in some lobbying on behalf of people who have fallen between the cracks as the result of recent budget cuts.  I am happy to report that the effort was successful, and we’ve started stitching together a new safety net. 

Nineteen years ago tonight, I wasn’t safe at home.  The judge had sheriff’s deputies come to our home to beat me for his pleasure and enjoyment.  He wanted to prove that he could deprive me of my right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.

In the process, he destroyed his own dreams.  Karma is a bitch with a bad attitude.

My life tonight is rich with friends and colleagues who are loyal, funny, inspiring, strong, brilliant, clever, empathetic, compassionate, successful, loving, courageous, intriguing, and reliable.  They are healthy people with deep integrity.  I have created bonds of sisterhood with my spiritual family.  We celebrate our joys together and comfort each other through life’s challenges.

Every day I treasure the people who follow my blog and leave comments.  We are joined in a mission to create safe homes for everyone. . .to treat each other with dignity and respect. . .to love unconditionally.

May you all be blessed abundantly with love, joy, safe havens, health, and prosperity!

Hoda Kotb, Today Show co-host, Dateline correspondent, and breast cancer survivor, has learned lessons that I think will help those of us who are wearing purple.

Her memoir, Hoda:  How I Survived War Zones, Bad Hair, Cancer, and Kathie Lee, is a delightful quick read which is loaded with photos.  She was born in Norman, Oklahoma to Egyptian parents.  When the malignant tumors were removed from her breast, she had the full support of her family and colleagues.  She has experienced the joy of being celebrated as a breast cancer survivor.

Hoda's Pink Ring

Jay Blumenkopf, Hoda, Kathie Lee Gifford

• Surround yourself only with people who fill you up.  Get rid of the toxic ones.
• Don’t sweat the little stuff ~ 90% of what you worry about won’t happen.
• If you’re still standing after surviving an illness or death of a loved one or whatever your cross to bear is, you get four words:  You Can’t Scare Me.  Use them.
• Don’t hog your journey; share it to help others.
• Allow yourself dark days to stay under the covers watching Law & Order reruns and eating junk food.

 Sharon Bialek has a lot of courage.  She wants to give a face to the women allegedly sexually harassed by presidential hopeful Herman Cain.  She’s an exceedingly attractive woman, but I noticed that the national media has opted to publish the most unflattering photos of her.  The one I’m using is the best of a very bad lot of photos which capture her looking like a bitter shrew ~ the taint that is cast on smart women who dare suggest that some creepy, powerful guy’s sexual advances were most definitely not welcome.

Jerry Sandusky